I was born to a couple who dearly loved God and served as international missionaries. As I look back at the memories, my favorites were when we were together as a family. At the age of five, I boarded a small plane with my brother which flew us to a boarding school four hundred miles away from my parents. The separation of nine months each year from my parents was very difficult and it continued to be so, even in High School and three events that I found to have a huge impact on my life. One was, when my brother died when I was ten years old, then my mother died two years later when the age of fourteen, my father remarried a single missionary who had never had children.
Even though I had been brought up in a Christian home, in the church, I didn’t have a perception of God as a God, a loving God. It was more as a God who judges. When I found myself in March of 1982 with an unplanned pregnancy, my emotions were of fear. I was scared. I was ashamed and I felt so alone. I had known the father of my baby for two months and felt, had a fear of rejection. Because of all this, I decided that the only option that I had was abortion. Because I didn’t want to face the shame that this unplanned pregnancy would cause my family. I drove myself to the Planned Parenthood clinic. That was the day that I had the start of a secret, a secret that I planned to take to my grave. My initial response was of relief and then I blocked away the whole event from my mind, at least that’s what I thought.
Pregnancy Help Center
Twenty-five years later, I found myself filling out an application for a Care Net affiliated pregnancy help center so that I could volunteer. This is when I realized that I needed to come forth with the truth and also that I needed to go through a post-abortion recovery program. In April 2008, I completed the post-abortive Bible study. It was twenty-six years after my abortion. After the study, the God that I now know is a God who loves, who has abundant grace, and is so merciful. His forgiveness is nothing that I take for granted. I see, even to this day, that God has me on a journey. That journey has given me a freedom, which has ignited a passion, for anyone that has been affected by abortion. Not only for those affected by abortion, but for those who find themselves with an unplanned pregnancy. I want both women and men in that situation to know the effects that abortion can have on them.